No matter how good my intentions are, I can’t seem to get motivated to post on weekends; why is that? I am also terrible about reading other people’s posts on weekends, so I look in my reader on Monday morning and wince. I might read a few here and there, but not nearly all of them. I like to think that this simply means I am not so far into my Blogging addiction as I think, or wouldn’t I be online a lot more?
So, a weekend recap. Friday evening, Steve and I went to the AA Speaker Meeting, then on to his old house to catch the two cats that were left there. We (meaning Steve; they weren’t, after all, MY cats, right?) went armed with turkey and a towel to throw over them in case they got all spooked, but it ended up being very easy. My chore was to slam the carrier door closed after getting Cat #2 in, and I thought I did a particularly good job. We took said cats to his mom’s house, and she was thrilled.
Jacquie and I had a yard sale on Saturday, and it was a total bust for me. First, we got rid of the majority of our miscellaneous junk things when we moved, and it hasn’t been long enough to acquire much more shit to sell. Second, I kept finding things of hers that I really wanted, so I started out in the hole. At the end of the day, after I paid for the things I bought, I came home with $12.25 in my pocket. Still, it was a good day. We haven’t been able to spend a lot of time together lately, so it was a lot of fun to just be together for the entire day. We have such a great friendship, we can go from laughing to beat hell about the silliest things to talking seriously about recovery and relationships in a heartbeat-a particular blessing. Owen and Hannah and her friend M. were there with us, too, but the girls actually went inside and slept the entire day (literally. Like from 10:00 am until 3:00 pm. WTF is up with that?). Owen just hung out with Jacquie and I all day, and was as sweet as could be. I came home tired from the sun and slightly sunburned, but feeling good about it all.
Saturday night, Steve and I got into our first fight since he moved in. It wasn’t a big thing, and certainly not something REALLY worth fighting about, but it has been interesting in terms of looking at my behavior and trying to figure out why I acted/reacted the way I did. There is no doubt he messed up a little, but I completely overreacted, and what should have been a minor skirmish turned into something much more ugly. What it boiled down to is that I wasn’t getting my way, plain and simple. I had a plan and it didn’t work out the way it was supposed to so I was pissed and threw a tantrum. However, unlike a three year old who throws himself down on the ground and screams, I threw ugly words and bitter anger around like they were broken toys. I have always known that this is a problem for me; only now, with him living with me and sharing all aspects of my life, I have to work a lot harder at curbing that “I want what I want” mentality. In just the few weeks he has been there, I have gotten used to falling asleep with his arms around me, and I felt horrible laying in bed next to him and having him turn away from me because I hurt him.
Sunday was better; he worked, and Owen and I stayed home and cleaned out the freezer and fridge (can you say gross? It smelled like rotting meat in there, and it turns out that it was. Gag.). I ran up and down the stairs 40 bazillion times doing laundry, and I literally did not leave the house all day long. It was good for a lot of reasons, not the least of which was processing what had happened with Steve, figuring out what my part in it was and why I overreacted so badly. I had to apologize to him when he got home, and he in turn apologized for his part in it, and we went to bed together instead of laying on a mattress apart.
And today, the beginning of a new week. A short week, as the office is closed on the 3rd, so there is much to be done in four days instead of five. We are going to head out on Thursday night to camp in the desert before we pick up Eli and Sam on Friday, so there is much to be done at home as well. And let’s not forget the 4th of July festivities beginning…the fireworks are tomorrow night (why then instead of Friday or Saturday is beyond me), so I think we are going to eat dinner in the Square and stay to watch them-and I will get through it just fine, and I won’t need to walk around with my arms folded across my chest and my teeth gritted; life is indeed sweet.
***Also, I think you have all forgotten that I am having a giveaway. This week is the last chance to enter, so please click here and enter if you would like a chance at one of three prizes. Thanks!