Do you all know how much I hate Wal-Mart (so much so that I won’t even put a link in)? My long-time readers do, but for those of you who don’t, well, you now know that I do, in fact, hate Wal-Mart. With a purple passion (and where in the hell did that little phrase come from? Anyone know?). I vehemently hate Wal-Mart. So imagine my chagrin when I HAD to take Sam there to get his glasses last year. Glasses that he broke on Friday, which prompted a little temper tantrum on my part involving several swear words and a bottle of Havana-Lime steak marinade. ‘Nuff said. Glasses that required me to actually GO to Wal-Mart and instigate an exchange with one of their oh-so-lovely employees.
It started off on a good note which lasted all of, oh, 32 seconds. “Oh, good, they are still under warranty!” she said. My heart leaped as I imagined a three minute fix and out the door we would go. Not so, my friends, not so. “However, they have discontinued them in our location, so it will take up to two weeks to get them. Can I offer you another set of frames instead?” When I asked her if she was going to comp a similar pair to me, since the ones he has are no longer available at their store, she seemed pissed and surprised that I would even suggest such a thing. “Why would I do that? I am trying to make it easier for you to get by until the replacement frames come in. I certainly wouldn’t be able to give them to you for free.” “So, um, why would I want to buy a second, brand new, three times as expensive set of frames?” And she had the balls to say, “So that people don’t laugh at him for having duct tape holding his earpiece on.” I about flipped my lid; in fact, I kind of stared blankly at her because she even went there, in front of my son no less. You know, the one with the duct tape holding his glasses together. I have to admire myself for my relative calmness, though. I simply said, “Is there someone nicer here with whom I can speak?” and it shocked her into apologizing. And then when I said “Is it really going to take two weeks, or is the order going to get here within a week and then it will sit on the shelf until I call in two weeks to see if it has, in fact, arrived?” She rather sheepishly said, “The order will probably be here in a week.” “Great, thanks,” I said, before walking out, dragging along behind me poor duct-taped Sam and Owen with two different shoes on (both for the same foot, no less). Good thing she didn’t see THAT, huh?
So. Sam’s glasses are broken and taped together with duct tape, Owen has managed to lose his shoes, but only one of each pair, and I don’t get paid again until Friday; why does this seem to be bothering everyone in the world except me, Owen, and Sam? It isn’t as if the duct tape is a huge piece obscuring his vision. No, it is a little tiny piece that simply holds the stem in place. Old Wal-Mart Hootchie Girl wouldn’t have even noticed had she not been holding said glasses in her hand. And really, Owen is an eclectic little dresser anyway; he is just as likely to have two different shoes on at any given time whether we can find the other ones or not. That’s how HE rolls.
Wal-Mart visit aside, though, the weekend was quiet. Sam caught a summer cold, and we had a 363 acre brush fire outside of town, and it was 105 degrees here, so the poor kids asthma flared up something terrible. He was taking his breathing treatments every hour until I could reach Janet to have a prescription for steroids called in, which made him jittery and totally grouchy. And I admittedly started getting just a little bit panicky there, too; his lips were turning blue, just around the edges, and while I know well that asthma is serious ALL the time, every once in awhile it hits me forcibly that kids die from asthma all of the time. After three doses of the steroids and a double dose of allergy medicine (per doctor’s orders, thank you), he was doing better, and by last night was almost completely recovered. Time to go back to the asthma/allergy guy, though.
What else? We went fishing last night and didn’t catch a single thing, again, but it was still fun. Came home and got the boys all scrubbed down and squeaky clean, and we were all in bed by 10:00. Steve and I had just gotten, um, involvedwhen in troops Owen (and I thought of you, Camille, and how you must have jinxed me!), carting his blanket and his pillow saying, “Sam kicked me out of bed.” Good thing it was dark, I will say, but damn the interruption! Besides that, Owen is getting very tall and lanky, and he is a restless sleeper; I think of the three of us, he was the only one who got a good sleep.
As ever, though, it is Monday, and a whole new day. Work is still crazy-busy, as the other agent won’t be back from vacation until Friday, and it is hotter than the 7 Gates of Hell today. Hannah was at a friend’s last night and they got caught sneaking out, so there will be that to deal with tonight, and Sam has to get ready for his upcoming week in Seattle; he is flying out next weekend. I may not be around much this week, but if I am, well, aren’t you the lucky ones?