The countdown to vacation has begun, with every night telling Owen “Five more sleeps,” and so on, until now there are only three more sleeps to go. I was going to work until noon on Friday but on Monday suddenly realized how foolish an idea THAT was; how much work am I really going to get done? So we will get up and have a leisurely breakfast of strawberry pop-tarts and coffee (for me), and with hope we will be on the road by ten. To say I am excited is the understatement of the year, I think. I am looking forward to being with my kids one last time before everything changes again, with the advent of a new school year and a new baby. I long for the smell of the ocean, am looking forward to seeing the kids’ faces as they see such a huge, moving, breathing entity as the ocean for the first time. I am looking forward to the wind and the clear sound of the waves, the feel of the sand beneath my feet. I am not delusional-I know there will be issues that crop up, that there will be moments of tension and uncertainty-I am expecting no Utopia. Still-this is my time, our time, to simply be who we are, with no masks and no pretenses.
I find, too, that something of a miracle has occurred in that I am genuinely looking forward to, no, craving, spending time with my sisters. I have been talking to my next oldest sister quite frequently lately, and it has been nothing short of amazing. The funny thing is that she has an uncanny way of calling on the days when I am falling apart, and I think she must think I am a nutjob all the time, but she still manages to tell me just what it is I need to hear, good and bad. There are no false words of comfort, no platitudes, and in fact she has told me some pretty hard truths-yet in the most loving and caring manner there is. The fact that the two of us have been somewhat estranged for a good many years may tell you just how much we have each grown, that we can meet again where we are in our lives and find new things to love. I feel so blessed tonight.
It has been a busy week or so, with eye doctor appointments (Eli needs glasses, and thanks to my HSA, I get to get new glasses myself for the first time in years!) and working at the editing job and getting ready for Hannah’s baby shower…plus my nephew is here, and my mom and grandma were in town over the weekend (which we ALL know is a whole other post, right?), we HAD the baby shower….and now, just a few more days until we leave, so there is the resultant flurry over all that. I am excited to be meeting a fellow blogger while on my trip, and in general I am just so hyped up and ready that words can’t describe it. In addition to all of this-as if it weren’t enough!-I find myself in the middle of repairing and rebuilding two relationships that have meant so much to me through the years
I am going to have a laptop with me while I am gone, so I might be able to squeeze in a post or two. I will try, too, to post one more time before I leave, because I really, really need to blog about, you know, my mom. And her craziness. And MY craziness when WITH my mom. You know; all that stuff. Thanks for hanging around, my friends.