I feel a little grouchy, a little blue today. Oh, don’t get me wrong, Thanksgiving was lovely in all it’s entirety, really, and I have much to be grateful for on a day to day basis, but still. It isn’t a good day today.
Too much death, for one thing. My OTHER friend with cancer, S., passed away Friday morning, then there was M’s funeral on Saturday morning. Yes, the funeral was lovely, actually, and it was a privilege to be there. However, the family is also now planning another funeral, as M’s ex-wife died Saturday morning. So the kids have lost both their parents within a week of each other, and it sucks ass. Another friend, H. is in the hospital with lung cancer, and really, it’s just too much. I know well that death is part of life, part of the deal, but damn. I don’t have any feelings of comfort or the beauty of being part of it all today, but instead I just think it sucks ass.
I am in major pain today, too, something wrong with my stomach/kidneys/ribs, something in that general vicinity is hurting so bad that tears come and go. I hate that, too, because it doesn’t sound like anything I can call my friend for a prescription for, it sounds like something I will have to be seen for. Which really isn’t going to happen unless I have so much pain I can’t walk.
I think I would have been better off not posting today, but I am trying to get back into the habit of it, so this is what you get. Just a Monday all the way around.